Women Don’t Necessarily Want Less Sex as They Age

Their Desire Depends on This Factor

Many people believe that the older a woman gets, the less interested she becomes in intimacy.

Even today, sex is surrounded by many myths and half-truths. One of them is the idea that older women are no longer interested in sex. Researchers decided to investigate what the reality actually is.

This Is the Important Factor

As reported by CNN, a study that tracked the sexual desire of 3,200 women over a period of 15 years (using data from the SWAN – Study of Women’s Health Across the Nation) found that it is not true that women automatically lose interest in sex as they age. According to the study’s lead author, Holly Thomas, the results showed that for about one-quarter of women, sex remains very important regardless of age.

However, being able to openly communicate needs with a partner is crucial. Women are more likely to consider sex important when it brings them the pleasure and satisfaction they desire. The more their needs are fulfilled, the more likely they are to continue valuing sex later in life. Loss of sexual desire is often viewed as a natural part of aging, but that is not necessarily the case.

older women's sex life

Previous research suggested that women’s libido declines with age. However, physicians say this does not match what they observe in practice. According to Thomas, a flaw in earlier studies was that researchers would assess a woman’s sex life at one point in time and then ask similar questions decades later. This approach created an average picture that failed to capture the fact that not everyone follows the same pattern.

Sex at 60 Looks Different Than at 20, but It Can Still Be Important

In this study, researchers followed how women’s sexual desire changed over time. They found that it generally followed three different trajectories:

  • 28% of women began assigning less importance to sex starting around midlife.
  • 27% of women reported that sex remained very important to them even in their 40s, 50s, and 60s.
  • 48% of women said sex was important after age 40, but their interest gradually declined during their 50s and 60s.

Of course, sex at 40 or 60 is different from sex in one’s 20s. Nevertheless, if people are healthy and their partner is attentive to their needs, sex can continue to play an important role later in life.

Women who continued to regard sex as important after age 40 tended to share several characteristics:

  • They had higher levels of education.
  • They experienced fewer symptoms of depression.
  • They had positive sexual experiences before reaching midlife.

Economic and sociocultural factors also play an important role. In addition, health issues often become more common with age and can affect libido.

What Does It Mean to Be Autosexual?

autosexuality

Many People Confuse It with Narcissism

For autosexual people, attraction doesn’t necessarily follow the usual path toward other people — it starts with themselves.

Autosexuality is a sexual orientation that’s often misunderstood or confused with narcissism, but the two are very different. So, what does it really mean to be autosexual, and how does it differ from being self-absorbed?

The Essence of Autosexuality

Autosexuality describes a sexual orientation in which a person is primarily aroused by themselves. Rather than seeking others to satisfy their erotic desires, autosexual individuals often turn inward, finding fulfillment through self-pleasure.

According to MindBodyGreen, autosexual people are “sexually attracted to themselves.” This doesn’t mean they don’t enjoy intimacy or relationships — they simply prefer themselves when it comes to satisfying sexual urges.

Autosexual expression can take many forms: favoring masturbation over partnered sex, fantasizing about oneself during sexual activity, enjoying sex in front of mirrors or reflective surfaces, or even dreaming erotically about one’s own body.

Not Narcissism

It’s important to note that autosexuality is not the same as narcissism. While autosexuals focus on themselves in a sexual or romantic sense, narcissistic individuals are infatuated with their own image, craving constant admiration and often exploiting others for personal gain. Autosexuality, by contrast, is about intimacy with oneself — not manipulation or ego gratification.

A Natural Sexual Orientation

Autosexuality isn’t a disorder or illness. It’s simply a sexual orientation, shaped by factors like self-acceptance and the discovery of what methods of self-pleasure work best for the individual

That said, if someone feels their autosexual tendencies interfere with daily life or relationships, seeking guidance from a professional can be helpful. But for most, it’s a completely normal, healthy expression of sexuality.

Understanding autosexuality can deepen self-love, foster acceptance of one’s own desires, and enhance empathy for others. Respecting and embracing this orientation is the first step toward personal growth and sexual empowerment.

We’re Having 30% Less Sex

More People Are Struggling With the “Dead Bedroom” Problem

Stress, money worries, and daily exhaustion are taking a toll on intimacy — but experts say it doesn’t have to stay that way.

It’s no secret that many people are feeling weighed down by stress, from financial worries to everyday burnout. But those struggles don’t just drain energy and mental health — they’re also spilling over into the bedroom. Searches for the term “dead bedroom” have skyrocketed by more than 200%, and surveys show couples are having 30% less sex than before.

So what exactly is going on, and more importantly, how can couples reignite intimacy?

The “dead bedroom” is real

A UK study found that couples now have sex an average of 47 times per year — down by nearly a third compared to past decades. For some, that means sex happens rarely, or not at all. But French intimacy expert Maia Mazaurette says there are ways to break the cycle.

Her first tip? Put down your phone. Doomscrolling through negativity on social media only fuels stress and detachment. Instead, focus more on activities that actually bring you joy and connection.

Stop the guilt spiral

Stress often chips away at libido and makes partners feel distant. But Mazaurette emphasizes that guilt only makes things worse. Instead of obsessing over what’s “wrong,” try to catch those self-critical thoughts early and replace them with playful, positive ones about what you could enjoy with your partner.

She also reminds couples that differences in desire are normal. Just like having different food preferences, it’s natural for one person to have a higher sex drive than the other. What matters is talking openly, without judgment, and finding compromises that work for both.

Your sexuality evolves — and that’s okay

None of us are the same person we were ten years ago, and our sexuality changes too. The triggers that once drove you wild may not have the same effect now — and that’s not a loss, but an opportunity. Instead of clinging to the past, embrace the chance to discover new ways of connecting and enjoying intimacy.

Beat the routine trap

Another common culprit behind a “dead bedroom” is routine. If you ate the exact same meal three times a day for years, you’d be desperate for something different — and sex works the same way.

Many people reduce sex to a duty with a single goal: achieving orgasm as quickly as possible. But experts say to flip that script. Forget the orgasm for a moment, and focus on everything else — play, touch, exploration. Try new locations, introduce games, or simply experiment. The possibilities are endless, and variety may be the best antidote to a stale sex life.

Are You Already Into Findom or Gooning Without Realizing It?

gooning

The Sex Trends Everyone Will Be Talking About

Sexual culture has always been quick to reinvent itself — but the internet is speeding things up like never before. According to sex and relationships expert Rachel Thompson, a handful of surprising new terms are set to dominate conversations (and search engines) these years. Some might sound familiar, others might make you raise an eyebrow — but all of them reflect how fast our desires, language, and online behaviors are evolving.

The Rise of “Gooning”

As Mail Online reports, researchers analyzed 160 million Google searches from the past five years to track what’s hot — and what’s fading — in sexual curiosity. The clear winner? Gooning.

In case you’ve never heard the term, gooning refers to a state of prolonged arousal achieved through sensory overload — think edging, or intentionally delaying orgasm through extended masturbation. It’s less about the finish line and more about stretching the experience as long as possible.

Close behind in the trend charts is findom (short for “financial domination”), where arousal comes from controlling or surrendering financial power. The familiar thirst trap — posting provocative photos just to feel desired — also made the top five.

What’s Falling Out of Favor

Interestingly, not every kink is thriving online. Searches for dogging (public sex or voyeurism) have dipped in recent years. Even the once universally searched-for foreplay saw the steepest decline of all. Classic BDSM staples like spanking and bondage are also on the downswing, dropping 33% and 36% respectively in search interest.

The Surprising Contenders

But other terms are gaining serious traction. Femdom (female domination) continues to rise, along with the gender-bending identity of the femboy — men or non-binary people who embrace traditionally feminine presentation. Non-traditional relationships are also trending, with throuple (a consensual romantic triad) showing up in searches. Even the more niche (and eyebrow-raising) fetish of vore — fantasizing about consuming or being consumed — is being Googled more often.

A New Sexual Vocabulary

One of the most fascinating takeaways is how younger generations are reshaping not only what they desire, but how they talk about it. On platforms like TikTok and Instagram, where overtly sexual words are flagged, people have built an entire coded language known as algospeak.

That’s how we’ve ended up with words like seggs (sex), corn (porn), mascara (a romantic or sexual partner), and even accountant (a playful euphemism for sex worker). These linguistic workarounds let content creators skirt algorithmic censorship while still having the conversations they want.

The Bottom Line

From gooning marathons to uncuffing summers, the way we talk about sex is changing as fast as our feeds. You don’t have to be fluent in the new dictionary overnight, but it’s worth paying attention — because whether you know the terms or not, these trends are shaping the way people flirt, play, and connect.

The $2,000 Rule: The Controversial Dating Trend Turning Heads

When it comes to love and romance, people put value on very different things. For some, it’s all about chemistry. For others, it’s shared goals. And for a growing number of daters, the deciding factor is what’s sitting in someone’s bank account.

Many young women already expect men to pick up the tab on dates. But this new trend takes things several steps further. Forget just covering dinner or movie tickets — the latest advice says women should only sleep with a man after he’s spent at least $2,000 (around €1,900) on them.

A Pricey Standard for Modern Love

Dating in 2025 is anything but simple. Thanks to apps and social media, you can meet a potential partner in seconds. Alongside that convenience, modern dating has also given us a new vocabulary: phubbing (ignoring someone in favor of your phone), vulturing (keeping exes around for benefits without starting new relationships) and now, this big-spending rule.

You’ve probably heard of the old three-date rule, which suggests couples should wait until the fourth meeting to get intimate. This new approach is essentially the luxe upgrade: intimacy is off the table until the $2,000 milestone has been met.

What the Experts Say

So, what’s the thinking behind this? The idea is that if a man is willing to invest that much before sex enters the picture, it signals genuine interest and a willingness to stick around. After all, spending that amount usually doesn’t happen overnight. If he’s patient enough to wait, the theory goes, he’s worth holding onto.

Dating expert Jana Hocking sees some merit in it. She points out that the rule gives women the chance to really get to know someone without the distraction of physical intimacy. “Honestly,” she admits, “if I’d followed this instead of the old three-date rule, I could’ve avoided more than a few awkward situations.”

Of course, she also notes the rule has its limits. For ultra-wealthy men, $2,000 is hardly a barrier — just pocket change spent in an afternoon. But for most people, it represents a significant investment, and perhaps that’s exactly the point: it forces men to show their level of commitment before the relationship takes a physical turn.

When it comes to dating, men are many times looking only for only a short term relationship or even for a casual sex. There is no chance for it if the girl is thinking according to this big-spending rule. It will be more comfortable to book a classy escort girl for a couple of hours for only a fifth of this amount and the entertainment with intimacy for the night is sure.

When Men Notice Women With Erect Nipples, Their Behavior Changes

Science says the smallest visual cues can shape emotions and actions.

What happens when men — or even women — see a woman with visibly erect nipples? Researchers at the State University of New York were curious about that very question, and their study reveals some surprising results.

Positive emotions (and a little arousal)

In the first part of the experiment, participants were shown images of the same women. Sometimes with erect nipples and sometimes without. Faces were blurred out so nothing else could influence judgment.

Both men and women rated the women with erect nipples more positively. Men, unsurprisingly, also reported being more aroused by those images.

Do erect nipples make men more generous?

The second part of the study – published in Evolutionary Behavioral Science – looked at whether heterosexual men would act more altruistically toward women with erect nipples.

Men were asked how willing they’d be to do favors for these women: lending money, giving them a ride, or tutoring them. Across the board, men showed more willingness to help when the women had erect nipples. Especially in situations that required being physically close.

Heterosexual women, on the other hand, did not show increased generosity toward other women in these scenarios.

A few caveats

The researchers admit their study has limitations: they only used attractive models, and they didn’t account for other factors like facial expressions, age preferences, or body types. Still, the results highlight how subtle physical cues can influence not just attraction, but behavior.

Which Sex Position Gives the Most Intense Orgasm for Women?

sex positions for best orgasm

Sex positions don’t make miracles — they won’t make you feel something you otherwise wouldn’t. But if penetration feels pleasurable, the right position can help provide the kind of stimulation that suits you and bring variety into your intimacy, depending on your mood and the situation.

For some, visual stimulation is key; for others, it’s about full-body closeness or being able to kiss during the act. There’s no universal formula — follow what feels good for you during sex.

sex position for best pleasure

Too Big, Too Small

If your partner has a large penis and penetration sometimes feels painful, a well-chosen position can help. But remember, the first priority is giving yourself enough time and gentle stimulation. Your partner should only enter you once your body is fully relaxed and aroused — which can take 10 to 45 minutes for many women.

Our vagina, which also functions as the birth canal, can stretch enough to let a baby through — a penis is not a problem for it. But only when we’re aroused through tender touch, especially on the clitoris and vulva.

Another key to pleasurable penetration is slow movement. The churning or pounding style is rarely enjoyable for most women. If you’re a man reading this and want to become a better lover, slow down your thrusts. Know that if you or your partner stimulates the clitoris properly during penetration, the pleasure is significantly amplified. As a woman, don’t be afraid to tell or show your partner what feels best.

The Classic Missionary Position

When lying on your back with your partner on top, you typically give them control of the action. Sometimes this surrender can be exciting, but even in this sex position, don’t forget to look after your own pleasure. Your partner uses their arms and legs for support and movement, while many women lie still with their legs raised.

This image is common in porn: women not moving, while men “do” things to them. Yet our pleasure can grow just like men’s, with movement. Unless complete submission is what turns you on, try placing your feet flat on the bed, knees apart, to support yourself during penetration.

Use your vaginal muscles — squeeze and release them while tilting your pelvis upward and then lowering it. Just because you’re on the bottom doesn’t mean you can’t enhance your pleasure with small body movements. If your hands are free, use them to control your partner’s thrusting pace and depth, or stimulate your clitoris to intensify the experience. And as long as your eyes remain open, the sight of each other’s pleasure only adds to the enjoyment.

Woman on Top

Riding your partner is great because it allows you to stimulate yourself in the way that feels best. For many women, this is the most satisfying sex position and can even lead to multiple orgasms. Because you’re in control of both internal and external stimulation, using your muscles.

It’s worth repeating: during penetration, also stimulate your clitoris if it feels good, or guide your partner’s hand to help. This position is also helpful when your partner is well-endowed, as you control the depth and speed of penetration.

doggie position

From Behind

Many women need time to feel comfortable with this sex position. Sometimes there’s insecurity about how we look from behind, or we might feel objectified or experience discomfort from deep penetration hitting the cervix.

Only do what you truly desire — this is all about pleasure. If not with a partner, you can explore this alone: kneel in front of your bed with a pillow under you, lean your upper body onto the bed, and use your hands for self-stimulation.

Once the pleasure becomes stronger than your fears, you’ll feel more confident and courageous in pursuing what you want and saying no to what you don’t. Don’t offer your body just for someone else’s benefit — choose a position that brings you joy, too.

Side-by-Side

With a male partner behind you, both of you lying down. This sex position allows for closeness and prolonged intimacy with minimal movement. It’s also ideal for partners with larger size. Unlike when your lower leg is between his, your upper leg pulled in close, and he penetrates deeply while kneeling. In both variations, you’ll have free hands for clitoral stimulation, which never gets old.

Rather than picking positions logically or switching too often in one session, follow what feels good in the moment and let it evolve through mutual play. We are not sex machines meant to cycle through positions to satisfy our partner. We should slow down, tune into our own bodily sensations or fantasies, and move as the pleasure naturally builds.

Sometimes legs get tangled, some sessions are amazing, others average — and that’s perfectly fine. What matters is not the number of acrobatic feats, but the orgasm we experience. Sex positions are tools, not the measure of good sex. Whatever position you choose, make sure the clitoris gets as much attention as the penis. Whether by hand or vibrator, stimulating the clitoris during penetration makes everything feel much better — if it feels good, do it.

2 Tips for Women from the Kama Sutra

enhance sexual experience

To Enhance Your Senses for Better Sex

Refine your sense of smell and become more sensitive to touch! One of the key pillars of a satisfying sex life is the proper functioning of the senses, which is supported by stimulating blood circulation. The exercises in our article are designed to help you refine your sense of smell and make intimate areas more responsive to touch.

Enhance Your Sense of Smell!
Scents are so closely linked to emotions that the ancient Indians considered the sense of smell the most spiritual of all senses. They often anointed their bodies with healing and mood-enhancing essential oils during sexual rituals. However, when talking about sexuality, it’s not just about sensual aromas, but also about a well-functioning sense of smell.

Although breathing is vital, most people pay little attention to it. Many people breathe through their mouths without using their diaphragm at all. As a result, only a small amount of oxygen reaches the lungs, which don’t fully fill with air. The outcome is low vitality, reduced sexual desire and frequent illnesses.

Breathing Exercise

Practicing proper breathing fills the blood with oxygen, which refreshes the brain. Try the following exercise: Sit so that your spine. Neck and head are aligned, and gently tuck your chin toward your spine. Inhale deeply through your left nostril – engaging your entire lungs. While keeping your mouth closed and blocking your right nostril with your thumb. Hold your breath while closing both nostrils. Finally, exhale through your right nostril while blocking the left. Then inhale through the right nostril, and continue alternating.

How Does It Help?
Doing this exercise daily will refine your sense of smell, making you more responsive to your partner’s scent. As well as the mood-enhancing aromas you use in the bedroom. This helps you tune in more deeply and enhances the overall experience of intimacy.

Stimulating Blood Flow in the Pelvic Area
The abdomen is the outward symbol of the womb and as such represents fertility. While in the West a flat stomach is fashionable, in the East a gently rounded belly is considered one of a woman’s most sensual features. It’s no coincidence that belly dancing is so popular in Eastern cultures. One of its key moves is abdominal rotation.

Abdominal Rotation

Place both thumbs on your navel, with your palms resting on the lower abdomen. Push your lower belly outward, then pull in your abdomen and diaphragm as tightly as you can. Now release your diaphragm, letting your belly move downward and outward. Start slowly, repeat the movement, then gradually speed up and keep a steady rhythm.

How Does It Help?
This exercise strengthens the abdomen, relaxes and sensitizes the entire body. Boosts blood circulation in the pelvis and intimate areas. As a result, these regions become more sensitive, potentially increasing sexual pleasure.

What Your Most Common Sexual Fantasy Reveals About Your Personality

sexual fantasies

If you’ve ever fantasized about a threesome, a sexy stranger handcuffing you to their bed, or your partner talking dirty to you during sex, don’t worry – you’re not alone. Experts explain what these fantasies might indicate about your personality.

Justin Lehmiller, a sex researcher at The Kinsey Institute, surveyed 4,175 Americans about their favorite sexual fantasies, and the results were quite surprising. According to him, it’s impossible to draw universal conclusions about the meaning behind a particular fantasy, as two people can have the same thoughts for entirely different reasons.

“Our fantasies are complex, and the level of focus on sex varies from person to person. What we find erotically attractive or arousing is deeply personal,” Lehmiller explains. However, his research did find common patterns – suggesting that emotional needs often align with what a person finds exciting.

sexual fantasies

If You Fantasize About Romance and Passion, You May Fear Abandonment

Strong emotional needs often manifest in highly romantic or passionate fantasies. Lehmiller believes that people who fear abandonment or struggle with attachment anxiety are more likely to have romantic and passionate sexual fantasies – as a way to soothe their underlying insecurities.

If you dream about someone passionately showering you with love during sex, it might be your mind’s way of helping you feel secure enough to fully enjoy intimacy.

If You Fantasize About a Threesome, You Crave Attention

Lehmiller’s research found that threesomes are one of the most common fantasies. This could indicate a desire to be the center of attention – where two people focus entirely on your pleasure.

It’s possible that in everyday life, you don’t receive as much attention from your partner as you’d like, so this longing manifests in your fantasies.

On the other hand, if you fantasize about being the “third” person in a couple’s experience, it might suggest that you’re seeking excitement and adventure.

sexual fantasy

If You Fantasize About Being Dominated, You Want to Let Go of Control

Being submissive or dominated by a partner is one of the most common sexual fantasies for both men and women.

Lehmiller suggests that people in high-pressure leadership roles – whether in the workplace or in personal responsibilities like parenting – are more likely to have dominance/submission fantasies.

For those constantly making decisions and carrying heavy responsibilities, surrendering control in the bedroom can be a form of release.

Additionally, those with sexual performance anxiety may be drawn to submission fantasies because they remove the pressure to “perform.”

“That’s why submission is such a liberating experience for many people – it allows them to escape their own thoughts and simply be in the moment,” Lehmiller emphasizes.

If Your Fantasies Feel Taboo, You’re Open to New Experiences

A common misconception is that sexual fantasies stem from deep psychological issues. However, Lehmiller’s research suggests that those with frequent taboo fantasies – like threesomes or BDSM – tend to have more vivid imaginations and are more open to new experiences.

“There’s no deep hidden meaning behind it – it just means the person enjoys thinking a lot,” Lehmiller says.

He also notes that in long-term monogamous relationships, sexual fantasies often serve as an outlet for novelty.

So if you find yourself fantasizing about new experiences, don’t worry – embrace it! And if you have the opportunity, consider bringing some of those fantasies to life in the bedroom.

Why Gen Z Rejects Casual Sex: Insights on Modern Dating

Older generations may find themselves in a surprising situation if they try to date someone from Gen Z. It seems that Gen Z is no longer particularly enthusiastic about one-night stands, unlike millennials, who eagerly embraced casual sex in the 2000s.

But this doesn’t mean Gen Z is becoming more conservative.
Rather, they reject random hookups because they seek a more exciting life and see happiness coming from different sources.

They Say “Yes” to Commitment, But…

According to a recent survey published by The Times, Gen Z is more inclined toward traditional relationships and even marriage – but they don’t necessarily believe in “forever.”

“For young people today, divorce is already built into their mindset as a normal possibility,” explains researcher Charlie Sawyer, who is also a member of Gen Z.

“It’s ingrained in our thinking that divorce is an option.
Since we don’t see marriage as a lifelong commitment, we’re much more open to trying it out,”
Sawyer told the newspaper. He added that Gen Z doesn’t necessarily want to follow the “socially normalized path,” which says a lot about their approach to relationships and sex.

One-Night Stands? No, Thanks

The survey asked 1,000 Gen Z individuals about which sexual behaviors they consider “common” or “uncommon” within their generation. The results:

By comparison, when the same question was asked to millennials in 2004:

  • Only 19% disapproved of sex with someone they didn’t know.
  • 78% said their friends would gladly engage in a no-strings-attached hookup.

Why isn’t Gen Z interested in casual sex? Experts suggest several reasons:

  • The “toxic environment” of porn, oversexualized media, social media, TV, and magazines has made it harder for young people to truly enjoy sex, leading to a kind of “sexual recession.”
  • Anxiety, mental health struggles, and the social isolation of the COVID-19 era may also contribute to their reluctance toward casual encounters.

“Young people today get their information about sex from TV, magazines, and TikTok,” explains sex expert Maria Yagoda in her book Laid and Confused: Why We Tolerate Bad Sex and How to Stop.

They’re Obsessed with Weddings

If they’re not into casual sex, what do they say “yes” to?

According to The Times survey, Gen Z is surprisingly enthusiastic about marriage:

  • 61% believe marriage is important.
  • 21% consider it irrelevant.

By contrast, in 2004:

  • Only 59% of millennials thought marriage was important.
  • 39% said it wasn’t really relevant to them.

Porn, Trans Rights, and Other Divisive Issues

Gen Z’s approach to porn consumption is also different from that of millennials:

  • 40% say their friends watch online porn frequently.
  • 36% say it’s not common among them.

For comparison, when millennials were in their twenties:

  • 58% said their friends watched online porn.
  • 37% said they didn’t.

If these numbers are accurate, porn consumption among Gen Z has decreased by 18% compared to the previous generation.

When it comes to trans rights, Gen Z appears to be quite open-minded:

  • 56% believe trans women should be allowed to use women’s restrooms.
  • 61% think schools should support students’ social transitions.

The Takeaway

Gen Z largely avoids casual sex but is enthusiastic about marriage – though only as long as it remains an option, not a lifelong commitment.

And when it comes to social issues like trans rights, they tend to be more progressive and accepting than previous generations.

The survey paints a picture of a generation that is a unique mix of freedom, uncertainty, and surprising traditionalism. They like the idea of marriage – but only if they can walk away from it at any time.

Whether their approach will work out in the long run remains to be seen.